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Ep #33: How to De-Escalate: Strategies for Special Educators
If there is one thing within the field of special education that I could pinpoint as the hardest, it would 100% be the behaviors.
And if I was a gambler, I'd put big money that I'm not alone in that opinion.
Today’s show is focused on de-escalation and I’m joined by Kaylan Long from Caffeinated Behavior Change. Kaylan serves her district as the behavior specialist. Throughout the episode you will hear real life examples of how different behaviors were handled as well as background knowledge on what causes behaviors, how we as teachers can begin to identify when a child is escalating and strategies to help de-escalate even the most upset child.
When you know better, you do better
Speaking of real life stories...
I have a story that I don't share often. But because you work within the field of special education, I feel safe sharing because I know you'll understand and won't judge me.
For two years, early in my career, I had a child on my caseload I'll call A.
Although a cute little guy with dark hair and freckles and a vocabulary to rival a college professor, A and I did not see eye-to-eye.
He had a lot of baggage packed away in his head and on his heart that I, as a young, naive teacher did not know about. And if I'm honest, I did not feel I needed to know anything about him to be able to teach him.
Unfortunately, I was wrong.
A was very good at pushing buttons and he held his finger on mine often. He knew exactly how hard to push to trigger me to get me to my breaking point and really seemed to enjoy the show.
It is within those moments where the regret and shame live. I feel failure at not being able to reach him...from not being able to teach him...and for losing my temper and reaffirming his belief that no adult could be trusted.
I didn't practice what I preach today, which is to start each day new, but instead, harbored negative feelings towards this child and dreaded working with day after day. I allowed those feelings to affect other aspects of my job, my home life and my mental well-being.
It still haunts me today...knowing that I didn't try harder to develop a trusting relationship with him brings me to tears every time I think of him.
A was my failure and I don't get a redo.
After almost 20 years of reflection, I know where I went wrong and I work every single day to NEVER make that same mistake again.
What did I learn and what do I want you to learn?
- There are no winners and losers
- Every child deserves a clean slate every day
- Without a relationship, there will be no learning
But when you know better, you do better and that's the reason for today's show.
_____________________________
I want you to have the skills earlier on in your career than I did. I hope you can get some helpful tips from this episode or at the very least know you are not alone.
Mentioned within the show is the Intentional IEP Summer PD Series. Click here to get the details.
Kaylan's credentials:
Board Certified Behavior Analyst
Practical Functional Assessment
Upcoming: 2 courses in the works! - SEL small groups for your Special Education Classroom; Co-Regulation & De-Escalation
Where to find Kaylan...
https://www.instagram.com/caffeinatedbehaviorchange/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClKISafseEk2mMfAQL_yLJw
https://www.facebook.com/CaffeinatedBehaviorChange
Learn more from her...
De-escalation Strategies for Staff
De-Escalation Prompts & Procedures | Staff & Student Visual Supports
Calming Strategies | Relaxation Sequence
Emotional Regulation: Identifying Emotional Triggers
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